Bridging the Generations
Visit any rural church in the UK and there’s a good chance that there will be a conversation about attracting young families and children to services and community activities. “Children and teenagers are the future of the church” is a phrase which is often bandied about. In many rural communities (although not all), church attendance is dwindling and congregations ageing. It makes perfect sense to try to reach out to new generations with ministries such as Messy Church and youth work.
However, in Thatcham, a small market town three miles east of Newbury, something quite different is happening. Karen Frost, Pastoral Development Worker in the Methodist Circuit, is working with her local primary school and care home, nurturing an unusual ministry which is bearing remarkable fruit.
“I used to be in Children’s Services,” Karen explains. “I felt it was time to leave and saw the PDW job come up for Thatcham, Newbury and Hungerford. I didn’t apply, but then the job description was changed to make it an older people’s ministry and I felt called. I had already led worship in care home settings and had a wide experience of working with older people. I could see there were ways to think outside the box.”
Having started Worship at Home during Covid which took a short worship service into the homes of local non-digital older people via donated Bluetooth/USB speakers, Karen came up with another idea.
“We launched Vintage Adventure three years ago with the idea of making it like Messy Church for older people. We meet every month at the Methodist Church – it’s Jesus-centred and all about hospitality. We partner with the local primary school and invite six Young Volunteers (aged nine to eleven) along with a teacher. They serve the tea and cake, join in with the table talk (discussion), dancing and crafts. The children act the dramatized readings and they clamour to be chosen to volunteer. They say it’s the best afternoon of the month, and so do our older guests. Several of them have memory loss and dementia. The children are briefed about what that means, and they are so incredibly sensitive and loving. The Head Teacher is a huge fan and to see intergenerational relationships blossoming before our very eyes is such a blessing.”
When the Ofsted inspectors came to the school last year, the young volunteers were desperate to speak to them about Vintage Adventure. They told them that they wished it was on every week!
“The students are the most wonderful ambassadors for the school. One month, they were all looked-after children and they loved the experience. One lad’s foster mum sat at the back to keep an eye on him as she was worried about how he might behave, but there was no need. He turned out to be the best of the lot. He really shone.”
Reminiscence Boxes from the Fifties, Sixties and Seventies are sometimes set up, which helps those with memory loss to re-connect with their past.
“The children learn from the older people about the Beatles, beehive hairdos, decimalisation and all kinds of things from the past. We see such joy in their faces. We were made by God for fellowship and the companionship offered at Vintage Adventure demonstrates love and service all rolled into one.”
One of Karen’s favourite stories is about a gentleman with advanced dementia who used to go to Vintage Adventure with his wife. He was ex-military and when the Queen had her Platinum Jubilee, he sat at the party with a little girl from Year Five who helped him make his crown. They really hit it off and it brought back memories of his grandchildren.
“When he died, his wife came to us and said, ‘He loved coming along so much. I have to ask if you would lead his funeral.’ I was on holiday, so Brenda the vicar led the military funeral. It was such a privilege to be there for him and his wife, all because of Vintage Adventure.”
As part of her role as a PDW, Karen also takes a simplified version of Vintage Adventure into a local care home. Many of the residents have lost their husband or wife and love the community feeling of conversation and being able to explore their Christian faith. At one care setting, where Karen leads monthly hymn singing, several of the residents are quite a way along their dementia journey. One lady, who is now non-verbal, is the wife of a retired vicar. When the hymns are played, she holds Karen’s hand and dances with her around the lounge. Often, tears stream down her cheeks.
“No one will ever know what memories it’s bringing back or the reason for her tears. But the only thing I can do for her is hold her hands, dance with her and remind her that Jesus still loves her. We’re definitely connected with people’s spirituality. The Holy Spirit is at work there.”
Memory Worship meets monthly at Hungerford Methodist Church. The Minister, Revd. Andy Fitchet, has this to say:
“Memory Worship is one of the most fulfilling and enjoyable things I do each month. We have a number of regular attendees who find it a safe and comforting space. Hearing people sing the hymns they know, which are in the recesses of their minds, is like seeing a glimpse of heaven.”
Karen subscribes to MOSAIC and finds it very inspiring. There is an RM hub at Wantage which she is looking forward to attending.
“I’ve met up with Jo Allen from RM a couple of times and really hit it off with her. Knowing that the support is there is a great help when you’re involved in ministry, especially if you work outside the box as I do.”
As Vintage Adventure, Hymn Singing and Memory Worship continue to serve the older community in West Berkshire, Karen and her team are connecting the generations and modelling the loving spirit of Jesus to them.